5 Things Meme: Goals

This entry is part 4 of 5 in the series 5 Things Meme

Comment to this post saying "FIVE!" and I will pick five things I would like you to talk about. They might make sense or be totally random.

Then post that list, with your commentary, to your journal. Other people can get lists from you, and the meme merrily perpetuates itself, hopefully for the rest of eternity!

From arliddian: Current Goals and Resolutions

The difference between where I am now and where I want to be can be measured in concrete, physical things: earn a decent weekly income at writing, get x stories published as ebooks, get x stories into print, post this many articles weekly, blog about things that matter, finish writing City of Glass, etc. But that isn't how I measure this journey.

See, there's another challenge arliddian gave me, the challenge to write 100 things about creativity. I took that challenge, held it in my mental palm, side-eyed it, set it down, then turned it over until finally I did the inevitable and took it completely apart to reassemble it into something better, something me. The result was I saw a journey I wanted to make, and it had nothing to do with outside goals.

pathway

There is a person I want to be and a life I hope will become. In the Paid to Exist Backpack is the Compass, which includes these words I return to over and over again:

What does the best day ever look like to you?

That best day ever should be how I spend my days. I should love what I do and love how I do it, even if it takes effort and time and faith and patience to discover exactly how to make that happen. The best day ever to me is a day I spend creating, a day I complete a creation, and a day I can share from my heart with the world. I am not yet paid to do this and every part of me has had to move toward understanding how to make this possible, how to share value and passion and love and joy and receive enough in return to live.

These last few weeks, I embarked on a journey to become that person who creates every day, who takes the time to make a moment, who stops to feel the sunlight on her face, who faces the blank page, the blank canvas without fear and draws the new and the ancient from inside herself to create something worth sharing. My hope is to become a person who is worth knowing, worth being around, because she builds you up, she cares about your dreams, and she can open up her own and be vulnerable.

Trust is about vulnerability. Confidence is about vulnerability. It is only when we allow others to see our hearts that we are vulnerable, and I want to be able to open my heart and have something worthwhile inside. I want to be a blessing.

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