Tris is NOT Pretty, and Why That Matters

So someone said something on Tumblr re: Four/Tris that I flat disagree with. They couldn't forgive Four for telling Tris she's not pretty.

Pretty.

Oddly enough, that made my blood boil.

Why is it you can write an ugly male character and have someone fall in love with him and that's great? Why is it that a girl has to be pretty or beautiful to be considered attractive or desirable? Why is it that this double standard is perpetuated by women?

Tris is not pretty. It is well-established by the book. Yet, she's capable and self-aware and confident and dauntless and desirable. She's got an honest lover who tells her the truth, that it's who she is that attracts him and not how she looks, who wants to find out how much it takes to break her, for crying out loud, to scare her just to see her wake up.

So, Tris isn't pretty and no one cares. Good.